We Can Choose

I’m thinking of all the people from my life-including the ones that are here on this planet with me that I don’t speak to or connect with anymore. Sometimes when we go through big changes in our lives we lose (or it feels like we lose) common ground with those we were once close to. There’s that point where you may ask yourself, “Does this person want to get to know the new me, or are they only interested in reliving the “past”? If the latter, then what do we have left to talk about?”

I’ve had time lately to think about what life means to me, and how I would like to show up for it and for all. I’ll share that with you, and I will understand if you feel differently-that’s all right! We are all going to feel differently about things.

Life is a series of experiences. There’s a saying about how we do the best we can with what we have at the moment, and I believe that to be true. We all have things we need/needed to learn, to hear, to feel, and to do. Sometimes those experiences lead us away from certain people and toward others-that doesn’t mean some of those people are worse or better than others. It just means that those experiences needed to happen for us to grow. Notice I said for us and not “to us”. Side note: I’m not talking about war, abuse, or disease.

If I look back, I can now see my life from a different angle. I can see where I gave in, gave up, or gave my power away. When I say “power” I don’t mean force-I mean what makes me Stacey. I am remembering those times that I let others decide things for me, or I let others make me feel like what made me Stacey was bad, wrong, too much, too little, etc. I didn’t stick up for myself. I did not take ownership of my own feelings and my own life.

I can’t blame anyone else for that. I know that was all me.

We are born, and we don’t know who we are. The early years are full of people who are telling us what to eat, wear, say, do, believe, look at, listen to, talk about, and who to associate with. Then we begin to learn what we prefer. We learn that we can choose and we can change.

Along the way, we meet those who don’t or won’t try to understand us and that’s all right! They will judge us and have opinions and that is also okay! We are not what others think of us. We don’t need others to approve of what we eat, wear, say, do, believe, look at, listen to, talk about, or who we associate with. We only need to choose, to be who we are, and share what we know. Those who are meant to hear us-will. Some will resonate with us and some will not. We don’t need to convince anyone of anything.

I feel compassion and gratitude for all beings. I feel that we are equals, without judgement. We all feel, think, and hurt. We all want to feel safe, loved, and happy. The less we judge, the more we let go of all that programming from childhood. People can’t “make us” feel angry, happy, included, or left out. No one is better than or less than another. That way of thinking is outdated. We can choose to think differently, but we don’t have to do anything if we don’t want to!

We can choose.

Whether I’ve known you for two weeks or my whole life, you’re important to me because you’re part of what makes me Stacey. I feel love for you. When I love someone I don’t just stop loving them. The kind of love can change, yes, but I don’t just stop. I’m grateful for all of my experiences. I am grateful to all who taught me things or helped me to remember who I am, or who I want to be.

I am grateful, I have compassion, and I am not here to judge. I am that I am. That’s how I will show up in life, and show up for all. I’ve said this before and it’s still true: Take what resonates and leave the rest. Either way, I’m going to be okay and so are you.

💜 I love you!



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Stacey Rowe

Stacey Rowe

I write about my life, experiences, and knowledge gained; no topic is off limits.